Wednesday, May 12, 2010


Grandmom & Grandpop has visited everyone in their dreams.  Except me.  I've felt so left out.  Perhaps they weren't proud of me while they were alive. Perhaps they didn't love me as much as I thought they did.  People say perhaps they know how terrified I am at the thought of encountering anything that has passed on that they don't want to scare me.  All these perhaps run through my mind.  Finally I spoke to my dad over the weekend, and he admitted that grandmom hasn't visited him either.  I didn't feel as alone anymore, because I know that grandmom KNEW he was her biggest supporter, and would have done anything for her. 

Well, last night.  She finally visited me, and not only her. She was with grandpop, and they were HAPPY!  Something that was not true in life.  But towards the end of Grandpops life I think he knew the mistakes me made, and I'd like to think he was sorry for them.  So maybe even if they couldn't be happy and together in life. They can now .  I remember telling myself I MUST remember this when I woke up, and I did.  Albeit bits and pieces, but the most clear in my mind was of them. Smiling.  My grandpop healthy and animated in his words & actions.